May 1, 2011 Johannasawalha

About Dreaming

Hi dear ones  –
In my last post, I was sharing with you my first foray into live streaming with a new show called Streamin’ & Dreamin’.  That made me think of dreaming.  Again. Having dreams.  And how much I allow myself to dream or not.  I noticed that I have a cap for my dreaming if I have had failures.  The year of 2010 goes down in history as the hardest one in my life.  I dealt with being a new mother, and a late one as such at 38, so I was plenty set in my ways and now had to adjust them in the biggest way I had to date – in my life.  
     And then I stepped down from my exec position in my coaching company due to the new demands of motherhood among other things that I started to wrestle with, like who did I want to be and what did I want to do from that point forward.  I was up for a TV show and super stressed about that, flying hither and thither for meetings.  And then we moved and I left a community of almost two decades, near half my life, behind in New York.  No wonder I then got PPD (in my case, the doc said, “she has post partum exhaustion depression, she needs at least 6 weeks of nothing around her right now).  That is 3/4 of a year ago now and I am starting to get some perspective on this experience.  It has been difficult claiming my near 20 years of experience as a coach when all my own humanity was hitting me in the face likt this, with such force.  I now know though that the only way to claim it is to tell it – what it was all like to be a teacher and be as human as this.
     Back to dreaming.  So during all this mental mayhem and after, I didn’t feel I quite had the right to dream big for my future, humbled by the hits of life.  Now.  Today.  I reclaim my right to do so.  And the pride in knowing that I have deeper knowledge and experience to share and teach about for people who have been to hell and back in what they are dealing with in their lives, whatever it may be.  So – I say, you are allowed to dream.  Always.  And dreaming doesn’t mean you re required to fulfill each one you dream about.  On the contrary, dreaming is a practice in and of itself.  A creative endeavor that spurs you forward towards where you will act next.  I conclude with a few quotes from people much wiser and experienced (especially with hardships  – so what am I crying about…?)  than myself…
“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.” ~Henry David Thoreau
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. ~Eleanor Roosevelt
“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.” ~Goethe
Love.  Always.

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